February 1st, 2005


Two OTZL moments of the day...

shinmizu wrote:

I simply cannot believe some of the students I get.  On the very first homework assignment, I had four (4!!!!) students write down "Answers may vary" as one of their answers on a homework assignment.  So, not only did they copy out of the back of the book, but they lacked the intelligence to realize that "Answers may vary" is not a valid answer.  Sure, answers may vary, so what the hell is your answer?  I'd rather them just leave the problem blank.


zqfmbg brought this into attention:

( If you don't take a job as a prostitute, we can stop your benefits )



A story of Eugene (OR).

Just got this promo mail from DeLorme in my inbox:


You're probably thinking that Valentine's Day (FL) has nothing to do with maps, and you are Likely (CA) Correct (IN), but we would still like to Tell (GA) you the Little (KY) known Story (WY) about the Bachelor (CO) who gave up his Freedom (NH) in search of his one true Love (AZ).  It is a Delight (MD) to hear and will take very Little (OK) Time (PA) to Tell (WI).

Our story begins in elementary school with a shy Kid (AL) named Eugene (OR), asking Helena (MT) to be his Valentine (NJ) with a Hand (SC) crafted cardboard Heart (MO).  Unfortunately, Helena (AR) had already said "yes" to Monroe (LA) and the Disappointment (WA) that Eugene (CA) felt was fitting for a child from Lonelyville (NY).

The two developed a Friendship (ME), over the Next (WV) few years, but it wasn't Strong (UT) Enough (MO) to keep Eugene (FL) from seeking Fame (OK) and Fortune (NF) in Far (WV) away places.  Eugene (IN) continued to Date (SD) and spent much of his Time (IL) at the Disco (TN), but he never Felt (ID) Content (TX).

Finally, he thought about the moments when he Felt (OK) True (TX) Joy (IL) and realized they were always with Helena (MI).  So upon his Return (VA) Home (CO), he used his Street (MS) Atlas (CA) USA 2005 software to look up the location of the local Flower (WV) shop to Purchase (NY) a Rose (IA), or perhaps a Bouquet (NY).  He then looked up a jeweler and bought a Diamond (AK) Ring (WI) that had a beautiful Sparkle (CA).

Seeing Eugene (MI) was quite a Surprise (NE) for Helena (OH) so she didn't Ponder (MO) the Fact (KS) that they were walking toward Engagement Hill (NC), but her response was never in doubt.  Fate (TX) brought them together and now the Happy (AK) Bride (TN) and Groom (TX) live in wedded Bliss (NV) while sharing complete Faith (MN) and Devotion (NC).  They no longer live in Lonelyville, they've since moved to Harmony (DE).

If all spams were like this, the world would be a much more enjoyable place... :D

  • Current Mood

"I have a brain tumour."

A man faced a challenge.  A deadly challenge.

The man did his best...

What I wanted to do with this column was try to prove that it was possible to survive and beat cancer and not to be crushed by it.

Even though I have to take my leave now, I feel like I managed it.

I have not been defeated.

-- Ivan Noble, The Time Has Come, the last entry on his Tumour Diary

For the past year or so since I first heard of you, Ivan, you have always been one hell of inspiration to me whenever I checked your diary from time to time.

You are a brave man.  You will be remembered.

Rest in peace, Ivan.

BBC writer Ivan Noble dies at 37

Ivan Noble, the BBC News journalist who has been writing about his treatment for a brain tumour for the past two years, has died aged 37.

Thousands of users of the BBC News website followed regular accounts of his cancer, which last year included a second period of remission.

In November, however, his tumour began to grow again and last month he was admitted to a London hospice.

Ivan died on Monday and leaves a wife and two children. (Read more...)